Wednesday Weirdness #52

1.) What items (if any) do you get embarrassed to purchase?

I can't think of anything I've been embarrased to buy. I figure it's none of the check-out person's business anyway.

2.) What sexual position do you and your partner/significant other use most?

Missionary--man on top--IF I had a man to be on top.

3.) Do you untie your shoes every time you take them off or do you slip them on and off?

I always untie them before taking them off, and I nag my children to do the same and to tie them when they are on their feet.

4.) What is the last thing you broke by accident?

I think it was a plate I dropped.

5.) If you had to lose one of your body parts what would it be and why?

I suppose it would be my appendix since supposedly we don't need it.

6.) How do you feel about anal sex?

I find the idea of it more stimulating than the reality, although I do get a lot of enjoyment from my partner's enjoyment of it.

7.) If you could have the ability to solve problems quickly and easily or the ability to know without doubt every time a person told a lie, which ability would you want and why?

That's an easy one--I'd want to be a foolproof human lie detector. That alone would prevent a myriad of problems.

Wednesday Weirdness #51: Story Time Edition

1.) Tell us how you picked the blog nickname that you write under. Were you considering using a different pseudonym or was the one you wound up with your first pick?

'His d' was my first pick. My name starts with 'd', so it was pretty easy to choose since i love being His.

2.) Tell us about your worst oral sex experience.

That was my first time since i had no idea what i was doing and wasn't sure i was doing it 'right', so i was really self-conscious about it. On the other hand, i don't think i've ever had a bad receptive oral sex experience.

3.) Tell us about the most fun night you've had in the last two months' time.

i don't get out much, so it has to be when i went out with my daughters on a trip to Las Vegas. We mostly drank, and much of it was free because the bartenders and male patrons were enamored of my beautiful daughters. i hardly ever drink, so i ended up being drunk the whole night and really paid for it the next day with a major headache. Another relative that was along on the trip recently posted pictures of the event on a social network, and seeing those pictures was so humiliating that i'm going to try being more sober and camera-aware on such excursions in the future. i did enjoy the night while it was happening, though.

4.) If you were in a restaurant sitting down ready to order and you saw something that grossed you out enough to make you get up right then and leave without ever ordering, tell us about what you saw to make you react that way.

This has never happened to me before, but i imagine if i saw cockroaches or mice or rats running around the restaurant, i'd lose my appetite and have to leave. This doesn't really fit into the scenario described, but something that really grosses me out is when employees use the restroom and don't wash their hands before going back to work. The problem is that when i have witnessed that, it has usually been AFTER i've eaten there, but once i see it, i don't go back.

5.) Tell us about your favorite childhood toy.

It is a toss-up between Barbies and Madame Alexander dolls. i collected both. i loved dressing and undressing them and doing their hair.

6.) Tell us about the weirdest sexual proposition you've ever been faced with.

Weird and super gross. A couple of different men told me they wanted to do oral sex on me while i was on my period. It never happened, and after hearing about that, i wasn't interested in anything else, either.

7.) Tell us about one of the not-so-good dates you and your current (or ex if you have no current) significant other have gone on.

My wedding nights were not very good. With my first ex-husband, he got sick and was throwing up all night long. With my second ex-husband, we were walking back to the hotel after going to a movie, and some idiots driving by threw a water balloon at us, and it hit and broke on me, and it wasn't water in the balloon. Maybe those wedding nights were omens that the marriages were cursed and doomed.

Wednesday Weirdness #50

1.) What condiment goes best with french fries?

For me, it is ketchup.

2.) What condiment do you feel best represents your personality?

Mayonnaise--white and creamy.

3.) If the love of your life was a different religion from you, would you convert for them if they asked you to?

No, it's not really conversion unless it comes from inside you.

4.) What is your favorite thing to eat with peanut butter?

i like grilled peanut butter sandwiches, so my answer is bread, butter and heat.

5.) If it were possible, would you want to know the day you were going to die?

No, we should live each day as if it is our last anyway.

6.) If you could change your eye color to anything in the world you wanted, what would you change it to?

i'd keep my own. i like my eye color--sometimes blue, sometimes green.

7.) Are you more often the partner in crime or the good conscience with your friends and family?

i've always tended to be the goody-two-shoes in any group i've been a part of.

Wednesday Weirdness #49

1. Is April 1st a fun day, or an annoyance?

An annoyance.

2. What is the best prank you ever pulled or had pulled on you?

Probably when someone jumped out and scared me. That's happened a lot. Apparently people like to hear me scream. i can't remember ever pulling a prank on anyone. i'm too transparent to be effective.

3. What do you think is the most underrated sexual act?

Man-on-top missionary position, still my favorite.

4. What is your favorite website?

Google. It helps me find all the other websites.

5. What is the most annoying commercial on the air right now?

i don't see many because i don't watch TV very often, and when i do, it has been recorded, so i fast-forward through the commercials, but i remember seeing some commercials a couple months ago that were super irritating. There were animated line drawings and what sounded like someone talking on a staticky phone connection saying a bunch of crap that mostly was unintelligible, and what words could be made out made no sense. i never even knew what that stupid commercial was for.

6. If you were going to create a porn movie, please describe the title, premise and 1st sex scene.

Oh gosh, i guess i would have to call it 'Real Boobs, Real Orgasms', and the premise would be that the women actually have real boobs and real orgasms. i haven't seen any porn movies in a while, but what i most remember was how fake the women's boobs and orgasms were. For the first scene, i would try to get a real-life couple who are comfortable and experienced with having sex with each other and then just let them do their thing. There would be a focus on how the woman's natural boobs move naturally instead of the lack of movement and/or weird line and plastic ripply look of fake boobs when there is some movement. There would also be a focus on the physiological indications that the woman is actually for-real cumming. And most of all, she would NOT look at the camera with her tongue licking her lips trying to look sexy. If she was really truly cumming, that is what would be sexy.

Wednesday Weirdness #48

1.) What is your significant other's worst habit?

Not giving me enough attention sometimes. i crave His attention.

2.) What piece of clothing that isn't lingerie or an undergarment do you have that you feel especially sexy/handsome in?

There is a top i liked so much that i got it in three different colors. It's old-fashioned looking and laces up the front from bottom to top with ribbon, and a portion of the sleeves laces up with ribbons, too. i think it's a really pretty feminine look.

3.) If you could drink ONLY two beverages for the rest of your life, which would you pick?

Water and iced tea.

4.) What is your worst habit?

Procrastination. i gave this same answer on another meme the other day, but on that one i think the question was about my worst character flaw. It is also a bad habit. i think it can be overcome as long as i don't put off working on it (a little joke there).

5.) Are you superstitious in any way?

No. There are times when i have thought i was cursed, though, but i don't think that's superstition.

6.) What kind of shopping do you hate doing most? (Grocery shopping, clothes shopping, shoe shopping, etc)

All of the above. Shopping is not a fun activity for me. i like to get in, get it done and get out as quickly as possible. There are a lot more fun and interesting things to do.

7.) What was a “fad” you remember from your childhood?

The Wheel-O. i loved that thing. i even came across one in recent years and still loved it. But my kids managed to wreck it. i don't think the newer version was as sturdy as the original. Other fads i remember enjoying are:

Chinese jump ropes
Klackers (big acrylic balls on string that got banned from school for being dangerous)
Slam books (those were great--pre-blogosphere memes!)
Mini skirts
Go-go boots
Granny dresses and granny coats
Peasant blouses (these seem to be making a come-back, and i'm happy about it)

Wednesday Weirdness #47

1.) In your opinion, what is your biggest character flaw?

Procrastination.

2.) What do you think is one of the worst television shows ever created?

The field is just far too vast to pick just one. Soap operas alone are a whole huge category of worst.

3.) Have you ever ended up injured after trying an interesting new sex position?

i don't recall that ever happening. Maybe i haven't tried anything new and interesting enough.

4.) How crucial do you think communication is between you and a regular sexual partner? Do you talk often about what works, what doesn't, things you want to try, etc or do you keep the discussions to a minimal and let the physical flow as it may?

Due to my former husband's disinterest and tendency to hostility, i became accustomed to not communicating, so i am trying to get out of the habit of keeping things to myself because i do think communication is crucial and not just about sexual things. Sometimes it is nice just to go with the flow, too, as long as nothing crucial is being ignored.

5.) Who are your favorite comedic actors/actresses?

Albert Brooks, Shirley MacLaine

6.) In what way(s) do you wish your childhood was different?

i used to think of things like how i might have been better off if my parents had never divorced or if i had always lived with my dad, but in looking back, i remember having a mostly happy childhood, so i don't have any real wish to change anything.

7.) Cotton Candy; Delicious treat or disgusting mess?

The last time i remember having it, i thought it was delicious--spun sugar, how could it not be?

Wednesday Weirdness #46

1. What makes a person sexy to you?

His masculinity, masterfulness, aura of power and control, intelligence, confidence, sense of humor, smile, twinkle in the eye.

2. When having the 'number of sex partners' talk with a potential significant other, would you be turned off if they had slept with more than a certain number of people? If yes, what is that number?

i can't imagine too many people having had more sex partners than my ex-husband, so i don't think i would be shocked or turned off. In fact, i don't see a big need for such a talk if we're both disease-free and intending to be each other's only partner from that point forward.

3. Once and for all, pocketbook sized dogs and the people who carry them in pocketbooks. Cute or crazy?

i have to say cute for the dogs and crazy for the people, especially if they dress them up and treat them like people. It's not the poor dogs' fault.

4. Do you give up anything for Lent? If so, what?

i don't do Lent, but i fasted a couple of days ago--the fast of Esther the day before Purim.

5. If you live with someone, what is the one thing you will never let them see you do?

i only live with my children presently, but this is universal no matter with whom i am living--i prefer to go to the bathroom in private.