I interviewed each of my children separately, and here are their answers. [My commentary is in brackets.]
N=9-year-old son
B=14-year-old son
H=15-year-old daughter
D=20-year-old daughter
1. What is something your mom always says to you?
N: "Put your belt on."
B: "Pull your pants up."
H: "Something about A." [A is my Sir.]
D: "Wait--give me my good-bye kiss!"
2. What makes your mom happy?
N: "Me cleaning?"
B: "A."
H: "Knitting."
D: "Hanging out with her kids."
3. What makes your mom sad?
N: "Sad movies."
B: "Someone dying."
H: "Disrespectful children."
D: "When we're sad."
4. How does your mom make you laugh?
N: "When she yells at B."
B: "Just being there." [i'm sure he means that having me around is more fun than a barrel of monkeys.]
H: "By going on about boys like I do."
D: "When we talk about boys."
5. What was your mom like as a child?'
N: "I don't know. I don't remember."
B: "I didn't know her as a child."
H: "Hot."
D: "She was smart."
6. How old is your mom?
N: "45."
B: "50."
H: "50."
D: "51, no 50."
7. How tall is your mom?
N: "3 feet...I don't know...5 feet."
B: "Shorter than me, like 5'4"."
H: "Like 5'5"."
D: "5'6"."
8. What is her favorite thing to do?
N: "Do stuff on the computer."
B: "Chill on the computer."
H: "Surf the web."
D: "Talk to A."
9. What does your mom do when you're not around?
N: "I don't know! How do I know?"
B: "Oh-ho! I don't know. Don't wanna know."
H: "Talks to A."
D: "Everything."
10. If your mom becomes famous, what will it be for?
N: "Being a rock star."
B: "For being the mother of me."
H: "Something to do with her religion, I guess, I don't know."
D: "Probably her crafts."
11. What is your mom really good at?
N: "Knitting."
B: "Knitting and what-not."
H: "Crafts."
D: "Crafts and typing and singing."
12. What is your mom not very good at?
N: "Wrestling."
B: "Video games."
H: "Nothing."
D: "Driving at night."
13. What is your mom's favorite food?
N: "Chili Spaghetti."
B: "Some form of chicken, I suppose."
H: "Chocolate."
D: "Hungarian Goulash."
14. What makes you proud of your mom?
N: "That she takes care of me."
B: "Raising me."
H: "She's a genius."
D: "How she is an independent woman."
15. If your mom were a cartoon character, who would she be?
N: "Wanda on Fairly Odd Parents."
B: "I have no clue. I don't watch cartoons."
H: "Miss Piggy from The Muppets."
D: "Marge Simpson."
16. What do you and your mom do together?
N: "Watch TV sometimes."
B: "Talk."
H: "Go on trips."
D: "We talk about boys."
17. How are you and your mom the same?
N: "We have freckles I guess."
B: "Same DNA."
H: "We look alike."
D: "We're girly girls."
18. How are you and your mom different?
N: "'Cause she's older."
B: "A lot of ways, like I have a penis."
H: "I'm athletic and kind of tomboyish, and she's a girly girl."
D: "I have short hair, and she has long hair."
19. How do you know your mom loves you?
N: "'Cause she tells me."
B: "She raised me. There's a lot of ways, but that's the main way."
H: "She says it."
D: "Because she tells us and she just does."
20. What does your mom like most about your dad?
N: "Nothing."
B: "Nothing."
H: "Nothing...the child support check."
D: "She likes his looks." [She has a different dad than the others, but i haven't seen him in years, so don't know what he looks like now. i did like both men's looks, though, at their respective times in my life, else i wouldn't have had children with them.]
21. Where is your mom's favorite place to go?
N: "Internet."
B: "California."
H: "My grandma's house."
D: "Wienerschnitzel."
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